These have been the best two years of my life bar none.
I could never imagined that love and life would bring to me such an amazing and blessed gift. Whatever happens in my life, I know that I am loved and love so much. All of the bad things and times in my distant past rarely haunt me anymore. There is only the love and warmth of the present and the beaming smile of a loving future.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Monday, September 22, 2008
A Father's Love
I checked my mail over the weekend and noticed a letter from my father, addressed to me with some really nice penmanship. It was a bit worried at first, but he had written me a rather beautiful and sad letter.
In the letter, he went over his misgivings and sadness at the way he raised me, feeling that he didn't bond with me enough. He asked for forgiveness and expressed his great sadness in what has turned into a basic misunderstanding and lack of friendship and communication on our part over the years. The letter ended with the most beautiful statement: "I will love you unconditionally until the day I die."
The next hour I re-read it, cried and reread it some more. I noticed my father has really beautiful handwriting and I don't think I've gotten anything like that from him before. I sensed so much anguish in sorrow in the letter that it hurt to know that he was going through how he must feel.
I called my mother and my dad happened to be out. I let her know that I was going to write him back and to tell him that I loved him and have never had any bad feelings or ill will toward him.
I ponder what to write back to him. He needs to know that he isn't responsible for how I am, and that I do love him and always will love him as well. I have tons of little fond memories of my dad and being with my dad, but also some scary ones as well. But, I've never hated him. I'm going to be visiting my family in early December so we are going to be able to talk more then too.
In the letter, he went over his misgivings and sadness at the way he raised me, feeling that he didn't bond with me enough. He asked for forgiveness and expressed his great sadness in what has turned into a basic misunderstanding and lack of friendship and communication on our part over the years. The letter ended with the most beautiful statement: "I will love you unconditionally until the day I die."
The next hour I re-read it, cried and reread it some more. I noticed my father has really beautiful handwriting and I don't think I've gotten anything like that from him before. I sensed so much anguish in sorrow in the letter that it hurt to know that he was going through how he must feel.
I called my mother and my dad happened to be out. I let her know that I was going to write him back and to tell him that I loved him and have never had any bad feelings or ill will toward him.
I ponder what to write back to him. He needs to know that he isn't responsible for how I am, and that I do love him and always will love him as well. I have tons of little fond memories of my dad and being with my dad, but also some scary ones as well. But, I've never hated him. I'm going to be visiting my family in early December so we are going to be able to talk more then too.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
A Weekend to Remember
What a wonderful weekend it was! Well it was more than a weekend, but all the same, even though some bad things happened toward the end, it was certainly a great time.
Thursday was a Monica bonanza, and we had some ultra-delicious sushi from Sushi tomo. I also got to meet Melanie for the first time, and she is more awesome than even how awesome everyone was saying she is. It was also Monica and Jeffy's anniversary! We got to check out Laura and Josh's new place--it simply looks quite wonderful and I hope Laura's business flourishes there.
Friday, was followed up by even more awesomeness. Monica and I went to see Tropic Thunder and it was quite the movie. Tom Cruise was insanely funny in it and the whole movie is simply a riot. Mitchell's Fish Market was also another wonderful place to go, and the food was great, though the company was much better!
The crowning time (literally!) was at the Renaissance Faire on Saturday. I think there was like 10 of that went. I got to meet Dennis, Bill, Dr. Ned again, and Laura and Josh also showed up. Monica was the fairest ninja maiden and got so many compliments on her beautiful outfit (and her legs!). Jeff was a bard in some very cool studded armor, and I was a silly maiden in green. There were so many reasons this was the most special time of my life, and I have the ring to remind me every day of what life should be and what I need to strive for in love and life.
Returning home on Sunday, my poor Dodge Neon broke down in Dayton. It sucked! What sucked even worse was that it was a transmission problem, meaning oh around $2-3k to fix it back up. What a bummer. So we eventually had to trade the car in for whatever we could get for it and purchase a new car.
Monica and Jeff got me a wonderful gift of a guitar over the trip which I took advantage of beginning to learn while I had some downtime. They are so special to me that they want me to achieve all my dreams. I will work hard to make sure that their dreams come true too!
Thursday was a Monica bonanza, and we had some ultra-delicious sushi from Sushi tomo. I also got to meet Melanie for the first time, and she is more awesome than even how awesome everyone was saying she is. It was also Monica and Jeffy's anniversary! We got to check out Laura and Josh's new place--it simply looks quite wonderful and I hope Laura's business flourishes there.
Friday, was followed up by even more awesomeness. Monica and I went to see Tropic Thunder and it was quite the movie. Tom Cruise was insanely funny in it and the whole movie is simply a riot. Mitchell's Fish Market was also another wonderful place to go, and the food was great, though the company was much better!
The crowning time (literally!) was at the Renaissance Faire on Saturday. I think there was like 10 of that went. I got to meet Dennis, Bill, Dr. Ned again, and Laura and Josh also showed up. Monica was the fairest ninja maiden and got so many compliments on her beautiful outfit (and her legs!). Jeff was a bard in some very cool studded armor, and I was a silly maiden in green. There were so many reasons this was the most special time of my life, and I have the ring to remind me every day of what life should be and what I need to strive for in love and life.
Returning home on Sunday, my poor Dodge Neon broke down in Dayton. It sucked! What sucked even worse was that it was a transmission problem, meaning oh around $2-3k to fix it back up. What a bummer. So we eventually had to trade the car in for whatever we could get for it and purchase a new car.
Monica and Jeff got me a wonderful gift of a guitar over the trip which I took advantage of beginning to learn while I had some downtime. They are so special to me that they want me to achieve all my dreams. I will work hard to make sure that their dreams come true too!
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