I used to be a very devout Conservative Christian...the kinda that pretty much unsettles me now. I was very bigoted, very unhappy, very uninformed. College changed a lot of that and so did finally coming to terms with things in my life.
I finally realized that the Bible is mostly a load of junk, and more of a historical record than not. I also realized that anyone who claims to tell you what happens when you die is also full of it. In becoming a devil's advocate for everything wrong with the Bible, I lost my faith and realized that life is so much more complex than being given a book and told to read it for your insight.
So what then? I started from nothing. I guess I could've stayed with nothing, but it wasn't really spiritual to have nothing. There is no hope for the future with nothing...because right now with science, in zillions of years the universe will have expanded into a freezing death full of nothing but aimless particles.
So I chose.
I chose Christianity because I was familiar with it. I choose to believe against the rationality that there is nothing to believe in. And now my Christianity is refined from the glob of coal it was before, to a shiny diamond of simple beliefs in the Golden Rule, the Beatitudes, the Sermon on the Mount, and the teachings and life of someone who has been hijacked by many religions for many other purposes. I believe he died for us all and that we are all saved by His Grace. You can choose to believe it or choose not to believe it, but in the end, He Loves you...and I love you.
Is it wrong to choose your religion or does religious awakening happen from other circumstances in life? Do we simply follow the religion of our parents and community or how do we find out what truths mean to us?
Against everything I know to be real and factual, I have faith in something that defies all reason.
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4 comments:
Don't worry beautiful angel! There is a vast gulf of difference between blind, irrational adherence to an outdated and historically flawed code set of attitudes (Eating shellfish will send you to hell! If your neighbor's oxen falls in your pit, then you're going to hell! Poly-fiber clothing will send you to hell!) and true faith.
I find it's hard to be a Christian lately- not because of my faith, which is stronger than ever, but rather because of so many others with politically motivated religious ideaology, that attempts to speak for me with a united, warmongering, homophobic, subjugatingly arrogant voice. Folks like James Dobson and Pat Robertson have done a bang-up job of convincing the media and the political establishment that they are the one and only source for all things Jesus. When, in truth, they literally have no idea what it means to be a Christian, to believe in Christ, and to be a person of faith. These are buzz words and political tools to them, not tenants of belief.
But, to make a very long rant much shorter- belief is absolutely a choice. That doesn't make it any less valid. Or, perhaps another way to look at it, is that we DO NOT choose the other options. Maybe faith is really a process of elimination, culminating it one core belief, one feeling of what we know, within ourselves is right and true- even if that truth only applies to oneself.
sounds that you found true Christianity. Glad for you
have a great week
When people ask me what my religion is, I usually tell them that "I believe in Christ, I just don't believe in people that say they believe in Christ." Of course what I mean by that is that I can't believe that people that judge others and act overall in a completely un-Christian manner can possibly believe in the same Christ that I believe in. So sadly, the term "Christian" doesn't seem to actually refer to somebody that follows Christs teachings, but the opposite!
Blessed are the cheese makers!
The sad fact is that probably the majority of people adopt the religion they were brought up with. The reason is simple - it's all about belief, and beliefs are shaped when you are young. You learn that if you get in trouble you will be punished, that if you swim too far you will drown, that if you drink Drano you will die. Most of the things our parents teach us are true, so we sign up for the whole package. Unfortunately, that does not leave a lot of room for new ideas to grow.
Just like in your experience, sometimes it takes a significant life change to question such long-held beliefs. We call that "finding religion" and of course it happens sometimes in prison, after a near-death experience, whatever. But I think the point is that when you find a spiritual path that feels right to you, you go with it. If that path comes with a lot of religious dogma that turns you off, then find something else.
We all have, as Shaw said, our own spark of divine fire. It's up to each of us to decide how best to celebrate that fact - no one should choose for us, including our parents and family.
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